Now and then, news entertains me.

You nasty seahorse you.

Real Conversation

Girl: Tell mom I’m a homewrecker.

Dad: You couldn’t be a homewrecker sweetheart. When you left here it fixed everything.

I just don’t get all the aiming talk

Is it better to aim high or aim low? I ask myself as I wonder why no one says, aim straight for the middle. That’s where they keep the bullseye.

hello me not dead

(The title of this post comes from a comic at spamusement.com)

Turns out I could well have been dead since none of you people checked on me while I was on hiatus. Maybe I will go back on hiatus. But really isn’t that just a fancy word for getting drunk on the new 3 Calorie Vodka and forgetting to think hard enough to post anything?

What have you missed while I was gone? Thanks for asking. Mostly… a lot of feeling vulnerable and dating people – that is not a healthy combo. Next time you’ve already tried the Vulnerable, just order the side salad. It’s a lot less confusing than the dating.

This one time I blogged about a guy, and another guy read it and thought it was him, then he freaked out at me. But to be fair, he was bound to freak out at some point. I was in college, I was totally experimenting – I didn’t know anyone with a blog, they were new. Forgive please.

I’m listening to Another Day by Air, which is probably one of the cheesiest and most terrifying songs on my playlist. Oh wait no I have a whole Kirk Franklin album.

Since I’ve lived in New Jersey (like, 5 posts away to you, but 5 months for me) I’ve learned a few things. I’d like to pass on that wisdom, but who am I kidding? You people aren’t going to do what I say. And this is a blog for joking. I should be back soon with more insepid easily digestible nothing-type fluff.

EDIT: Insepid is not a word.